Life goes on – Part 2

When I woke up later that morning, the sun was trying to peek through the curtains on my window. I glanced at the clock on my nightstand. It was after nine. The house was quiet. I got out of bed and went over to my door and looked out. The door to Mom’s bedroom was open and I could see her still on her side.

Worried, I went back into her room, “Mom? You awake?”

I had to repeat myself a few times before I heard, “Hmm? Jerry, is that…”

Her voice cracked as she rolled onto her back. Although she wasn’t crying, the grief in her eyes cut me deeply. “Todd.”

There was nothing else for several dozen heartbeats. Finally I said, “You want some breakfast? I can pour you some cereal.”

Her lips twisted, almost as though trying to turn the deep-set frown into something else. “Thanks, sweetie. You might want to put some clothes on first.”

I looked down and blushed. When I had gone to sleep in my own bed, I had stripped down to my gray and white boxer-briefs. I turned and hurried from the room, embarrassed. It had to have been at least two or three years since Mom had seen me in as little.

Clothed in shorts and a t-shirt, I returned with a couple of bowls of cereal. Mom had taken off the women’s suit jacket as well as the black pantyhose. She reclined against her pillow in the white, long-sleeved blouse and black skirt. Her face was puffy from all the crying.

While we ate, she said, “I guess we should clean up from yesterday. I’m sure the guests made a mess of everything.”

I had just come from there. I’d seen worse after some of Mom and Dad’s family get-to-gathers. But getting her up to do something, anything, was better than leaving her to mope all day long.

We cleaned the entire downstairs, vacuuming and mopping as needed. Lunch and dinner were from one of the casseroles. It was about six that evening when the doorbell chimed. I hurried to open it. I didn’t recognize the Hispanic woman standing there, but in slow Texas drawl, she said, “My husband, Juan worked with your daddy. I’m bringing over a platter of tamales for dinner.”

After taking the disposable dish from her, I closed the door as she walked away, wondering how many more meals Dad’s coworkers would bring.

Things were better tonight than last. At least at first. After dinner, Mom retreated to the bathroom. I heard the shower running for a bit, while I played on my PS5 in my room. I was just about to go knock on the bathroom door to see if she was alright, when the shower turned off and I heard her moving about. She spent the rest of the evening in her room until bedtime.

I kept my door open that night when I went to bed. And It was close to midnight when I heard hard-wracking sobs from Mom’s room. Worried, I pulled on my shorts and hurried into her room. Even though it was pitch black, I knew where she was and I climbed onto the bed, saying, “Mom, Mom, it’s okay. I’m here.”

Mom threw herself into my arms, pushing her face against my neck. I could feel the flannel nightgown that Jerry had bought her this past Christmas, rubbing against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, confused about what to say or do, so I did nothing but hold her.

As I held her, I realized something soft pushed through the fabric of Mom’s gown. I knew immediately what it was. After all, I’m a twelve-year-old boy and I’ve been very curious about some girls in my junior high for the better part of a year. I’d be lying if I told you I had never looked at Mom’s breasts through her clothes. After all, she was the one girl I saw every evening. But I had never considered touching them. Heaven forbid!

And I didn’t, not even now, as I felt her small mounds, now unrestrained by a bra, pressed against my chest. So, I ended up thinking about Mrs. Abernathy, my math teacher. She seemed like a hundred years old, and she was as mean as the day was long. If I hadn’t done that, I would have died of mortification if I had gotten a boner while Mom was hugging the front of my body.

Mom eventually let go of my neck and she lie back down, “Thanks, sweetie. I hate that I’m a fucking spigot, and can’t seem to turn off my eyes.”

Before then, the only time I heard my mom cuss had been when we were stuck in traffic and someone had cut her off. I said, “I don’t mind, Mom. I’ll stay in here.”

She rolled onto her side and I fell into place beside her, also on my side. This time, I pulled the covers up. Last night, falling asleep in my dress clothes, I hadn’t gotten terribly cold. But I was only wearing a pair of basketball shorts tonight. Mom took my hand in hers when I put it across her arm, and before long she was asleep.

I dozed off, but when I awoke. Just like before, Mom’s butt was pushed against my crotch. And just like last night, I was hard as a rock, my penis sliding against her backside. I felt dirty, knowing my man-parts had pushed against Mom’s woman-parts. And even though I knew it wasn’t anyone’s fault, I figured Mom would be even more embarrassed, and that was the last thing I wanted. I pulled my ass back, putting some space between my groin and Mom’s butt.

The next morning, I awoke to the sound of my alarm in my room. It took me a moment to figure out why. But then it dawned on me. Today was supposed to be my first day back at school. I slipped away from Mom, thankful she was still asleep, because at some point my groin and her backside had moved back together during the night.

When I got into the shower, I couldn’t ignore my erection any longer and as hot water sluiced down my body, I wrapped my fingers around my erection, stroking it and feeling the magical tingling that always came with touching myself. Still, I hadn’t jacked off since before Jerry’s death. Maybe I lasted a minute. But I doubt it. My vision dimmed as I felt my climax pulsating in my fist. A little blast of clear cum shot into the air, splattering on the shower stall floor. A couple of more clear drops flew out in subsequent spasms. This felt so much better now that I could actually cum. The first year after I learned about jacking off, it had been a lot of fun playing with myself, but since my penis began shooting a few clear drops of my boy-juice around Christmas, I was pretty sure, this was the best feeling ever.

Feeling more in control of myself now that my hormones weren’t messing me up as much, I finished getting dressed and then came back into Mom’s room. I knelt beside her, “Um, Mom, I gotta go back to school today. You going to be okay?”

I wondered if she heard me. Then she nodded. In a dead voice, she said, “Yeah.”

I hated leaving her home alone, but I didn’t have a choice.

I jumped to my feet, pumping my scrawny arms into the air as DeQuan sank the ball from the three-point line. It was about all I could do from the bench. Coach Brown was required to put me in each game, according to the UIL rules. But as one of three white boys on a team with seven black boys, with a black coach, I didn’t get to play more than that.

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